days of diarrhea and le vet bizzarro (mannhandled)

le bisquit has come down with a little sumthin', i am afraid. he has had the runs now since friday. he has had an even grosser variation on your typical runs after we had a fun little meetup with the dean-assaels at the park. what can i expect, what with all the running around? the high temps? the bowls-full of water? things were a little extra runny last night.

luckily the fine peeps at northside veterinary clinic were able to fit him in this afternoon. however, i was not prepared for dr. mann.

of course, dr. mann was in some ways a breath of fresh air for the clinic. our original doc, dr. leiman, is very thorough, but during one visit he "shushed" brian while he (the doc, that is) was trying to listen to the biscuit's heartbeat. those of us who know and love the dub know that there may be times where a good "shushing" may be called for, but i found it to be a little bold and off-putting. i think bdub was just stunned.

anyhoo, dr. leiman wasn't in today. neither was the last vet we visited with, dr. zamata. dr. z. may be andy kauffman's latest character, if andy is still with us and up to his old tricks. the similarity is really striking (wish i had a pic of dr. z. for comparison). dr. z. assured me that the speckled appearance of the biscuit's penis is totally normal, which i was relieved to hear in his somewhat whispered hush: "oh noooo....every dog is different. he is fiiine.." i enjoyed his tone of wonderment, which seemed to equate le bisquit's bits to a unique flower.

but back to dr. mann. dr. mann just about flipped out when he saw my dog. he immediately started rough housing with him right there in the exam room, and followed his crazy (i'm talking CRAZY) display by fashioning the biscuit a bandanna out of some checkered material and a pair of scissors he had sitting on the counter. interesting.

the biscuit was non-plussed by the vet's feats of fashion, of course, but i don't think he enjoyed it so much when dr. mann flipped him up (yes, seriously, he flipped my dog up onto the exam table, legs in the air and all) and started pulling on his hind quarters, commenting to me that he "had great hips!"

dr. mann proceeded to assure me that all would be fine, punctuating his sentences in a mix of upspeak? and almost an "mm kay?" a la mr. garrison.

whatevs. i am just happy to have vets who care about le bisquit and who don't lecture me about his diet, even when the "delicate flora" in his gut is out of balance, like today.

le bisquit is expected to have a full recovery, poo analysis pending.
le dub is expected back this evening from a brief stint in seattle with my brightest diamond. i see a delicious dinner and some makin' out in my future. sweet.