homeschooling preschool

oh my, has it really been over a YEAR since i last updated my blog?! unbelievable.

so much has happened, there is simply no way for me to recap it all, but it has been a wonderful year. i believe that i have found my stride, and so has my husband. it's awesome. life is really, really good--- rich, fun, busy, fulfilling, exciting.

max is just an amazing human being with whom i love spending my time.

what sparked the interest in picking up the blog again is this: max is two and a half. on march fifth, an innocent parenting newsgroup to which i belong became flooded with posts: it was preschool acceptance day, and so many were wait-listed, or talking about where their kids got in, etc. one wrote about her concern that her kid (who was not attending) would be left in the dust as a result of having no other kids to play with! (they would all be in preschool!) and yes....that freaked me out but good.

thing is, in looking around for a preschool, the desirable schools are nearly all full-time situations, or at least full days for a few days a week, and they are all unaffordable (they would require almost half of my annual salary). i am still considering preschool for age four, but our situation is unique, and we certainly are not in need of a full-time childcare situation. additionally, if this was something we wanted to do, i should have begun the process of applying while he was still in the womb, apparently (i wish i were joking- required viewing: nursery university).

the beautiful part is that a full-time or even part-time but full day childcare situation is not what i desire. with much thought and consultation with parents whom i respect and love, i have figured out what it is that i desire:

-a close bond with my child
-a parent-oriented child
-a child who is exposed to many different types of people of many different ages
-a child-led curriculum which focuses on his intense interest in reading and music
-when he cannot be with me or bdub, a devoted caregiver who is a kind, intelligent, and gentle model (ladies and gentlemen, meet jeffrey).

and this is what we have. essentially, amid the preschool competition (which is much more intense in our area than acceptance into most major universities), the $20,000 annual tuitions, the fundraising committees and the application fees and the essays about the perfect little snowflake that we are supposed to pretend is our child, this is our plan:

we are homeschooling preschool. i feel like i've got my teaching mojo back! (i have a degree in k-8 music education, was a substitute teacher of all subjects and grades for three years after college, and have taught private flute lessons as well as general music, orchestra, band, and choir to grades 6-12). i am very excited about this. i would like for it to be child-led for the most part, but max is also a really voracious learner who likes being exposed to new things.

additionally, we:
-attend a church nursery on sundays from appx 9-12.
-attend a playgroup monday and fridays from 11:30-1
-may attend an unschooling playgroup in the teacher's home tues and thur from 4-6 (more to come on that-- see
-will likely attend dalcroze eurythics class at the special music school

sounds like a plenty full schedule for a 2-3 year old. most importantly, i am honored and happy to spend this time with him. childhood really is so short.

more to come.

hot dog

this afternoon, the biscuit and i were running some errands in our neighborhood. a group of 'tweens passed us and one of them took a look at the biscuit and exclaimed,

"DID YOU SEE THAT DOG?! YO, THAT DOG WAS HOT!!"

word, son.

i think i have a crush on garrison keillor

q: what passes for "aromatherapy" to norwegians in lake wobegon?
a: bacon and coffee

the 'rents came into town and brought with them much ado (fun, chaotic, at times exasperating and publicly of the "i am trying to act casual but new york scares me a little" ado)...plus tickets for us to go to a live broadcast of a prairie home companion at the town hall theatre. dad did us a solid and managed to somehow finagle seats that were about eight rows from the front and five seats from the middle aisle, with the sound effects guy smack dab in front of us!



fred newman was able to extract from his mouth the sounds of horse's whinnies, prowling tigers, even the notorious alligators of the new york city sewage system. his arsenal held telephones, deadbolts, creaky doors, a pair of shoes hanging around his neck. for me, he was definitely one of the highlights, though i really felt as if i had experienced two hours worth of good, clean, american music and humor. seriously. i felt down-right patriotic....and not patriotic in the bushie "i'm an amerikkun- freedom ain't free" kind of way. it was more a feeling of being wrapped in a warm blanket of the familiar. the entire production completely sucked me in. i was entranced.

thanks, dad.

afterwards, we walked north several blocks (through times square--always fun eye candy for the tourist) to rockefeller center to behold the tree:


now that's something.

so it begins again: my love affair with where i live. there is something magical (or atleast fun) about a place where you can stuff yourself with a plate of pierogies, a bowl of borscht and fried dumplings for $7.50 (what can i say? dad had a hankering for polish food. and yes, i know that pierogi ARE dumplings...i just wanted fried dumplings too), experience a magnificent show, trudge through the masses at times square, and take in perhaps one of the most iconic of all holiday spectacles..all within a matter of hours.

being as the broadcast was from new york, garrison keillor sang a little ode to west 43rd street to get the audience warmed up, and the program contained a short essay from one of APHC's writers on being a new yorker (almost). an excerpt:

I Might Have Been A New Yorker
Laura Buchholz- December 2007

When I moved to New York in 1996, I came with the "let's give this six months and see what happens" attitude. I lasted for 11 years, almost 12, having just moved back to the Midwest in August of this year.


And while I throw back my head and laugh every time I think about my new spacious two-bedroom apartment with high ceilings and hardwood floors and lots of closet space with a garage and NO ROOMMATES for $900 a month, I am concerned about my membership in the New York club. If indeed I was ever a member in the first place. Leaving New York feels an awful lot like going all the way through medical school, and then the internship and the residency, and taking on all the debt, and then deciding-you know what? I think I want to raise chickens.


When I announced that I was leaving New York, my friends tended to have one of two reactions. The first, delivered with an incredulous sneer, was one simple word: "Why?" The second was a bit longer, but still sounded like one word:

"ohmygodyouaresoluckyyouaregettingoutof
hereIwannagetoutofheretooIamgoingtodiehere
ohmygodIamgoingtodiehereinNewYorkifidon't
getoutofheresoonwhenamigoingtogetoutof
hereyouaresolucky!!!"


Both of these reactions are correct.


How long does it take before a person qualifies as a New Yorker? Some say 10 years. Others insist it's 15. I tend to believe that however long you are in New York, add another two or three years and that's when you qualify for membership. 21 years? You're not really a member until you've been here 23. And if you leave--the clock probably goes back to zero. I don't want to believe this, but knowing New York, it's probably true.


......


But there are things I miss. Alot of them. I miss how easy it was to meet up with people. New York is like a giant dormitory for ambitious adults. A giant dormitory with a rat problem.


But I have suspended my membership for now, and that is okay. If the clock goes back to zero, so be it. I can take it. Because I was a New Yorker, I think. Or at least I was two years away from being one.


......

i heart ny

i got a message today from deanie, telling me she always thinks of me and the dub on september 11. i think of her, too, of course.

somehow on that day, i managed to be in touch with all of my peeps whom i needed to be in touch with: bdub woke me with a call from the J train (which rides above ground over the williamsburg bridge), telling me that a plane had hit the world trade center, and that he could see it from the train. we kind of shared a "huh. how weird. i hope no one was hurt" exchange, and i went to the window of my hallway and surveyed the billowing smoke. i turned on CNN and was glued to the tube as the second plane hit.

kara dean called me. she was near times square, and the first to report to me that things were seriously crazy. i told her bdub would be at his rehearsal space just a few blocks away. somehow, they met up on the street and walked to brooklyn together (bdub says he clearly remembers his brain scanning the faces of people on the street, and its recognition of the beautiful deanie).

in the meantime, i got through to my mom. brian's sister heather got through to me. so did kara's sister, meredith....she had such worry in her voice, and i was grateful that i was able to tell her that i had talked with deanie. i bounced from window to computer to tv to phone, in shock. all day.

when deanie and bdub arrived, naturally, i made pasta.

i will be forever grateful that everyone i love was able to put their fears to rest easily that day, and know that we were safe. i am still so thankful that bdub was the first to call me and give me the news--that i never for a second had to worry about him or my dearest friend. so many spent the days to follow pleading to their fellow new yorkers, "have you seen my son/daughter/husband?". they almost wanted a moment just to talk with you, as one mama did with me. just to know you or someone or an entire city was praying for their loved one. i think of her when i think of those who have taken advantage of her loss--to exploit many more of our sons' and daughters' lives, to exploit our fear and our loss through a senseless war.

i am trying today to just reflect on our city and its healing, rather than to express my own anger. perhaps that is for another day, and today is just a day to remember.

my love

funny how i have felt so compelled to start this blog. it isn't my first (which was a sad documentation of a time that needed to be recorded, but which i would rather put away for a while). it is, though, nice to have a means to type the non-specific things that come to mind. plus, it seems that i am always in the mood to write this time of year. every journal i open from my bookshelf seems to start in september. i wonder why that is?

i was inspired by my friend and occasional colleague kristy, a mom, wife, model, singer, actor, and baby wrangler, to document the fun misadventures of city life (in fact, i just realized upon looking at kristy's blog that i totally yet inadvertantly stole "misadventures" from her blog description, and...um...added it to mine. sorry, kristy! i would assume, though, that most people blog about their "misadventures" of one kind or another).

anyhoo, "rage kage", as i like to call kristy in my mind, seems to have a knack for capturing so much that is fun yet unnoticed about urban living. it's refreshing, really, and has inspired me to blog and hope that i can some day have as much fun with future wolfeinellis as she has with her girls. she makes me believe that it is indeed possible to raise children whose lives are enriched by the city, rather than hindered by it.

this has been a HUGE realization for me over the past few months, and was really triggered by my mom sharing with me that she and my sister were talking about bdub and i, and were discussing what an exciting life our future kids have in store. i can't tell you how much that meant to me....

A) that i have family that views my life as an exciting adventure (rather than a colossal mistake--i know many people--freelancers, artists-- whose parents are simply waiting for them to find a real job and get over it already) and

B) that hearing their perception really helped me to change my own...perhaps from one of panic ("how are we going to DO this when we have KIDS???!!!") to one of, again, feeling blessed, of knowing that we live in abundance and that we and our kids will have enough-- enough love, enough time together, enough structure and enough resources to have a pretty good life.

but i digress....

once a month, rage kage lists her loves, the little things she appreciates about her sweetie and her girls. what can i say? i'm a huge sap and it struck a chord with me. so sue me. plus, i happened to be married to one of those guys who is, like, always doing amazing, wonderful things just because he loves me. it would be a shame not to give him any credit.

MY LOVES--june-july-august:
-being so helpful and taking such good care of chris and jen during their visit
-making our six flags adventure spirited and fun!
-cooking dinner when i was so tired from the graco jobs
-picking me up in greenpoint after your gig, even though my phone was ignoring you and you were so tired
-your patience and love towards my family
-complimenting me on my wedding skillz--i appreciated the props!
-being such a great date at the nups in LA
-helping me to drive and collect donations for beezie and matt
-the many early work dropoffs, when i'm sure you would rather sleep in
-meeting me at the train with the biscuit (there are few things i would rather see than the two of you trotting along towards me)