there is no delicate way to put this.
my child just had a sh*tstorm in his crib.
pooped. took off pants and diaper. smeared excrement everywhere.
then he called for mommy.
aren't you glad you're reading my blog today?
epilogue: bdub is home. he is dressing child and taking child, along with soiled linens & stuffed animals, to the laundromat. he is then purchasing (several?) bottles of wine and asparagus (again, bite me, trader joe's). how much do i love him?
Thursday, April 14, 2011
for the love of all that's holy, NAP, SON! NAP! and 15 things (again)...
1. while the child has been MUCH improved, behavior-wise, since my last post, he needs to NAP!
2. i am having anxiety about a dinner guest who is coming tonight. see #1. i hope my child is not a terror.
3. trader joe's produce can bite me.
4. i have gone to bootcamp three sessions in a row-- friday, mon, wed. the instructor KICKS MY ASS, but not in a mean way. hard to explain. it's fun to push my bod and makes me feel a little competitive, which is strange.
5. easter. right around the corner. give me strength.
6. as barcelona approaches, how much do i prepare mackey for the abandonment-- rather, the disappearance--- rather, the absence of his parents? i have just started telling him that daddy is going back on tour, and he's convinced that he is going, too (as a third drummer, because, you know, that's necessary/plausible).
7. i love the forced de-cluttering that comes with dinner and/or house guests. the apartment looks great. please, everyone, come over! i cook for you!
8. can't stop thinking of a horrible news story that karadean shared with me. i won't share it here, because then all of you won't stop thinking about it either, but suffice to say, people do desperate things when they feel they are out of options. please-- if you need help, REACH OUT.
9. it's gorgeous out today. hope to enjoy it at least for a little while.
10. i am owed quite a bit of cashola these days. wonder when i can start cracking heads?
11. my son is obsessed with the book rat catching by crispin glover. the book is essentially this weirdo art piece wherein glover deconstructed an instructional manual on how to catch rats, and inserted all of this disturbing imagery. it is not appropriate for children. i have hid it, and mackey found it, after asking, like, a million times, "where is 'catching rats'?"
12. the voice from the other room is informing me that he "made a poopoo" so i guess that's my cue. it'll have to be "12 things" for today. le sigh....
2. i am having anxiety about a dinner guest who is coming tonight. see #1. i hope my child is not a terror.
3. trader joe's produce can bite me.
4. i have gone to bootcamp three sessions in a row-- friday, mon, wed. the instructor KICKS MY ASS, but not in a mean way. hard to explain. it's fun to push my bod and makes me feel a little competitive, which is strange.
5. easter. right around the corner. give me strength.
6. as barcelona approaches, how much do i prepare mackey for the abandonment-- rather, the disappearance--- rather, the absence of his parents? i have just started telling him that daddy is going back on tour, and he's convinced that he is going, too (as a third drummer, because, you know, that's necessary/plausible).
7. i love the forced de-cluttering that comes with dinner and/or house guests. the apartment looks great. please, everyone, come over! i cook for you!
8. can't stop thinking of a horrible news story that karadean shared with me. i won't share it here, because then all of you won't stop thinking about it either, but suffice to say, people do desperate things when they feel they are out of options. please-- if you need help, REACH OUT.
9. it's gorgeous out today. hope to enjoy it at least for a little while.
10. i am owed quite a bit of cashola these days. wonder when i can start cracking heads?
11. my son is obsessed with the book rat catching by crispin glover. the book is essentially this weirdo art piece wherein glover deconstructed an instructional manual on how to catch rats, and inserted all of this disturbing imagery. it is not appropriate for children. i have hid it, and mackey found it, after asking, like, a million times, "where is 'catching rats'?"
12. the voice from the other room is informing me that he "made a poopoo" so i guess that's my cue. it'll have to be "12 things" for today. le sigh....
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
terrible two's
so truly, i feel like a worthless parent a lot of the time lately.
as for the things i have control over, i really am committed to doing my best: i feed the kid really good, very healthy whole foods. he begs for broccoli, so i feel ok in that right.
we stick to a schedule. even if he won't nap, we lay down at 1 pm for a nap, and he's in bed at 8:30.
we barely watch tv-- maybe an episode of dora here and there. he's a bookworm. i love this.
but, omg. he is a terror. he has been hitting me and my husband. diaper changes are often torturous.
when we need to head out somewhere (generally to take him to an activity like story time or a play group), he is less than amenable. he doesn't listen. at the mere suggestion that we need to get ready to leave, he will pull out the "drums" (pots and pans), listen to records, and read every book in the house.
once we are out of the house, he insists on driving the car if we're driving, and if we're strolling, he fights getting into the stroller.
he has turned into a big yeller. instead of just saying, "i'm done" or "i'd like a banana, please" (of which he is perfectly capable of doing and has done a million times), he will just YELL.
he pushes the dog. the only member of the household whom he treats with respect is the crotchety 14 year old himalayan cat, because we all know what will happen if you cross a 14 year old himalayan cat.
maybe i could learn a thing or two from the cat.
and "helpful" facebook "friends" respond to my status updates of "two year old driving me up a wall" with things like, "just wait til he's three!!"
that is sooooooo not what i needed to hear, friend.
i try to be consistent with the discipline. i NEVER let him get away with hitting me. i am not at all afraid of a public time out, and have plopped him down in the middle of the pharmacy or grocery store for two minutes without a second thought.
i offer choices rather than make demands. i try to be a good model (you don't see bdub and i swatting each other's faces or yelling at the dinner table).
the waters are getting rough out there. moms, if you are reading, throw me an oar. do i just wait this out, and keep the consistency of what i am doing (even if it doesn't seem to be working)? do i need a different approach? do i shrug it off, and accept that this, too, shall pass? because while he is adorable, hilarious, compassionate, and sweet as sugar lots of the time, the black cloud of terrible twos is encroaching on my home, and i don't like it.
as for the things i have control over, i really am committed to doing my best: i feed the kid really good, very healthy whole foods. he begs for broccoli, so i feel ok in that right.
we stick to a schedule. even if he won't nap, we lay down at 1 pm for a nap, and he's in bed at 8:30.
we barely watch tv-- maybe an episode of dora here and there. he's a bookworm. i love this.
but, omg. he is a terror. he has been hitting me and my husband. diaper changes are often torturous.
when we need to head out somewhere (generally to take him to an activity like story time or a play group), he is less than amenable. he doesn't listen. at the mere suggestion that we need to get ready to leave, he will pull out the "drums" (pots and pans), listen to records, and read every book in the house.
once we are out of the house, he insists on driving the car if we're driving, and if we're strolling, he fights getting into the stroller.
he has turned into a big yeller. instead of just saying, "i'm done" or "i'd like a banana, please" (of which he is perfectly capable of doing and has done a million times), he will just YELL.
he pushes the dog. the only member of the household whom he treats with respect is the crotchety 14 year old himalayan cat, because we all know what will happen if you cross a 14 year old himalayan cat.
maybe i could learn a thing or two from the cat.
and "helpful" facebook "friends" respond to my status updates of "two year old driving me up a wall" with things like, "just wait til he's three!!"
that is sooooooo not what i needed to hear, friend.
i try to be consistent with the discipline. i NEVER let him get away with hitting me. i am not at all afraid of a public time out, and have plopped him down in the middle of the pharmacy or grocery store for two minutes without a second thought.
i offer choices rather than make demands. i try to be a good model (you don't see bdub and i swatting each other's faces or yelling at the dinner table).
the waters are getting rough out there. moms, if you are reading, throw me an oar. do i just wait this out, and keep the consistency of what i am doing (even if it doesn't seem to be working)? do i need a different approach? do i shrug it off, and accept that this, too, shall pass? because while he is adorable, hilarious, compassionate, and sweet as sugar lots of the time, the black cloud of terrible twos is encroaching on my home, and i don't like it.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
fifteen things
15 things on my mind today....
1. bdub and i booked my ticket to....BARCELONA!!!
2. i am intrigued by the budding coop preschool in my 'hood. hope the Little Acorns Playschool works out for max (how cute is that name?)
3. why is my kid not sleeping?
4. i really need to clip the biscuit's nails
5. must go to the gym today
6. i am still green with jealousy over bdub's chiropractic appointment, and need to just get over it and book one for myself.
7. i love my mom
8. what are those bright yellow blooms that grow up big bushes? forsythia? because there is one in the landlord's backyard, and it fills my heart with glee every time i look out my window at it!!
9. bdub made me the most delicious veggie dog: jumbo smart dog. delectable. perfect "snap" to it. reminded me of summer.
10. can't WAIT for summer!
11. three of my most favorite peeps are aries: beezus, karadean, and lil e. i love you girls.
12. i miss aunt kappie muskulls and hope she is doing ok.
13. seriously, my son is yelling from his crib.
14. i must find a flattering swimsuit. if anyone is reading this and you have ideas, please post.
15. a good friend gave me some awesome advice (via her therapist): if you have something on your mind that is overwhelming and causing you to ruminate, allow yourself a certain time during the day to think about it. that way, you are allowing it to be but it is not overwhelming you. i added to this that during my time to think about it, i will either lie flat with my eyes closed or take a walk, but not try to do anything else during that devoted time.
and one to grow on:
16. "there is a light that never goes out" is my favorite song by the smiths. however, whenever i hear it, i get nostalgic to a debilitating degree. ah, youth.
1. bdub and i booked my ticket to....BARCELONA!!!
2. i am intrigued by the budding coop preschool in my 'hood. hope the Little Acorns Playschool works out for max (how cute is that name?)
3. why is my kid not sleeping?
4. i really need to clip the biscuit's nails
5. must go to the gym today
6. i am still green with jealousy over bdub's chiropractic appointment, and need to just get over it and book one for myself.
7. i love my mom
8. what are those bright yellow blooms that grow up big bushes? forsythia? because there is one in the landlord's backyard, and it fills my heart with glee every time i look out my window at it!!
9. bdub made me the most delicious veggie dog: jumbo smart dog. delectable. perfect "snap" to it. reminded me of summer.
10. can't WAIT for summer!
11. three of my most favorite peeps are aries: beezus, karadean, and lil e. i love you girls.
12. i miss aunt kappie muskulls and hope she is doing ok.
13. seriously, my son is yelling from his crib.
14. i must find a flattering swimsuit. if anyone is reading this and you have ideas, please post.
15. a good friend gave me some awesome advice (via her therapist): if you have something on your mind that is overwhelming and causing you to ruminate, allow yourself a certain time during the day to think about it. that way, you are allowing it to be but it is not overwhelming you. i added to this that during my time to think about it, i will either lie flat with my eyes closed or take a walk, but not try to do anything else during that devoted time.
and one to grow on:
16. "there is a light that never goes out" is my favorite song by the smiths. however, whenever i hear it, i get nostalgic to a debilitating degree. ah, youth.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
